Walking down the street, one of the last sunny fall days. The higher-pitch of a voice that has only been in use less than eleven years bounces up. “Do you….do you ever think about….?” Pause. I lean in, as this seems important. We continue walking…..leaves skittering…. “Do you ever think about how today only happens…
Tag: well-being
12) Ninja Training, Part 3: My first Habit
To illustrate the process outlined in earlier posts, I am choosing EXERCISE. This is a good one, because I’ve set it before, have partial success usually, but can never make it stick. When I was 17, and spent my summer earnings from McDonald’s on a universal gym that I then built in my mom’s basement,…
11) Ninja Training, part 2: WISE goals
I am presenting to the world, the Dolderman Theory of Intrinsic Motivation. This is rooted in complex systems thinking, humanistic psychology, and modern integrative social-developmental neuroscience. But for now, let’s stick with the fun, useful part. My claim: WISE goals rule, especially for long-term happiness. They wipe the walls with those silly SMART goals we’re…
10.1) Important theory stuff if you’re skeptical about Intrinsic Motivation
I want to try to make as clear as I can, and briefly, just why Intrinsic motivation gets so much glory. Especially because it can sound idealistic and unconvincing, even cheesy. So we’ve gotta understand it. The core issue is the SOURCE of your motivations. Where do the motivations come from? Inside or outside? …
10) Ninja Training — Habit Change, part 1 (or how to stop “being a loser”)
Important Preamble: Let’s start off with a common understanding here. I am not some motivational guru. No way man, not even close. Here’s the thing –each person in life exists within, and indeed is formed out of, a karmic web of infinite cause and effect relationships, which interact dynamically through vastly complicated feedback loops that…
9) Stop trying to hit me. And hit me!
I love the ‘training montage’ moments in movies. Like martial arts movies, when the hero gets his (or, very rarely, her) butt kicked. Hard. Leaving the hero practically dead, washed up, hopeless, beaten and broken. Then some kind person helps the hero, nursing her back to health. And then, training montage time! That’s when all…
8) Gobble Gobble
Celebrating Thanksgiving today. It’s an interesting thing to do, to celebrate the bounty that life brings. I’ve always liked the holiday, and the idea of being grateful for things. But I have to admit, although this makes me sound like a terrible person, the truth is, for most of my life, even when I’m trying,…
7) Beauty eh?
Want to learn how to see lightning bolts on a sunny day? No? Seriously? Okay fine…whatever. Your loss! Oh, wait, you said yes? Oh okay, cool. Then I have a little story for you. About lightning bolts. And the Secret of Life. One of my favourite things in the world is to wander around, uh,…
2) Hillel the Elder
If you asked me, earlier in my life, how I dealt with anger or anxiety, I would have been puzzled, and felt kind of sad for you. Anger? Anxiety? Sorry pal, those are your problems, not mine. Me, I’m super chills. Easy going. I enjoy life to the fullest! No regrets!! Just take it easy,…
1) I sentence you to be exposed before your peers!
I was going to give this blog a “wiser” sounding title. Something inspirational, growth-oriented, “positive”. Or something deep, maybe something from Lao Tzu. But you know, I’m not very wise, although I’m striving in that direction. I’m not very growth-oriented, or positive, either, much of the time, although I play that role for some people…