Tag: self-compassion

50) Dirty Feet (TW: suicide, sexual assault)

(NOTE:  I realized recently that the author of this post is unspecified, and some people have thought it is me.  To be clear, this is a letter sent to me by someone who took my classes, and I thought I had commented that it was my “first guest post”, but clearly I didn’t here.  Sorry…

34) Less than half, and none of the important ones: Part 4

What are the solutions? Obviously, “get help”. But that’s kind of a cop-out. It’s not like therapists have a magic wand, and then, Healioso Instantantum!!, and Poof, you’re all better. Therapy isn’t magic. It’s hard work. A therapist is like a catalyst; they catalyze your own self-healing. But they can’t do it for you. So…

32) Less than half, and none of the important ones: Part 2

Imagine a child who is criticized, constantly. Long-term. Made fun of, humiliated, shamed in front of others. “Why can’t you do anything right?” “Goddammit, you’re useless!” “Shut up….you little shit.” They hear that they are stupid, ugly, pathetic, annoying, too loud, too quiet, too lazy, too….x,y,z…. As a psychologist and teacher, I encounter a lot…

31) Less than half, and none of the important ones: Part 1

Have you ever been on the receiving end of someone’s harshness? Criticism? Gas-lighting? Name-calling? Bullying? Shaming? Humiliating? Lying? Well, “sticks and stones may break your bones but words….” Just stop. Right there. Because “words can never hurt you” is absolute, dangerous, bullshit. Words can break your heart, poison your mind, even destroy your life. They…

27) Gratitude Day 7: Breaking Your Vows

I am grateful for a Rumi poem. It’s the opening poem to the beautiful book, The Illuminated Rumi. “Come, come, whoever you are! Wanderer, worshiper, lover of leaving. It doesn’t matter. Ours is not a caravan of despair. Come, even if you have broken your vows a thousand times. Come, yet again , come ,…

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